I use to say I was a perfectionist, everything had to be just right. It`s a wonder I ever sold anything. Now as I think on this topic , I realize it was more of a control issue and went right along with the wanting to please others, wanted them to think highly of my skills. This is all an illusion because people don`t think alike. What may be perfect to me , is not acceptable to someone else, they would never do it that way! they might say. So the need to make it perfect was a need to control the situation in a way. If I make it perfect, I`ll be accepted, or I`ll make money from it and that gives me have value as a person. This was my thinking. I was chasing an illusion of how I thought it would turn out. If I do A B C perfectly, D will come along. But then I tried to put something out for sale that wasn`t perfect in my mind. Someone came along and loved it. I realized how limiting my thinking was to this "perfect" box I was in. The box is small ,not much space to move in there. A mistake isn`t always a mistake, it may just be in your mind, not someone elses. Doing your art and letting it come into being without giving it descriptive words, could be a way to stretch yourself and open up. I see perfectionism as constricting and critical. Who says what is perfect? How many things haven`t come into being because someones negative thoughts while creating?
Now when I make something, I just do it , enjoy the doing. I think of what the old me would be doing right now, but then I am aware that I`m not that way anymore, sometimes it`s hard to get use to a new way of being, even confusing sometimes, but I keep staying in the moment. Just some thoughts, may be helpful to someone. Melanee
